I feel like I randomly said I would stick to just the good stuff whenever I wrote about what I noshed on, Whole Foods cakes notwithstanding. But sometimes one feels the need to just let it all out ya’ know. Of course I am not doing this wantonly yet aiming at something that will be impervious to whatever words of mine spew forth. Seriously, no one is reading this anyway so why not. I am still on the bakery train and riding in the same car as it were with a revisit (or two) to Macrina Bakery.

I do this knowing full well this place is already popular and will go on as usual with or without whatever I have to say. Each time I have been there is always a healthy crowd already there and a steady flow of others coming through the door. Based on my previous post I have found a couple things that are okay and then the chocolate chip cookie which is quite the best. However, as enticing as things looked in the case they did not necessarily live up to hoped for taste. Kind of like what I experience when I hit up an Asian bakery, everything looks pretty and neat but feels more like eating air. I like my desserts to have heft, have I mentioned that? It is why I go for cookies, cupcakes, cake and donuts. No ice cream, flan, pudding, jello—just not satisfying enough for all the calories and carbs I am investing!

Even with my weird rules and eating habits, things don’t always work out. I find when I am at a bakery with a loaded case I do get a little overwhelmed with choices and want to try everything, and sometimes I do. Though not on one visit….usually. With all that said, my biggest gripe here was with a savory option, thus the title for biscuit takedown.

Before the main event there were these tiny variations of a pineapple upside down cake. Same cake, different fruit, miniaturized. Biggest gripe, once you got past the top layer, was a little dry. Seems all the flavor was at the top, or the bottom now the top as it were. I mean they were fine in their way, though I guess I just miss the maraschino cherries. Joys of being a 70’s kid!

Hmmm….this looked promising but maybe it had been in the case too long? The cookie was dried out and the the marshmallow filing had hardened up and was beyond chewy. I probably should have heated it up or something but instead I just kind of gave up. Fresh out of the oven it might have been something but as is, not so much.

And here we are—-the biscuit. Forget perspective on this, it is a close up shot and the size is more palm of hand than two hander. First quibble, lack of buttering after warming up. Sure, butter in the mix, but once you warm these babies up they need some butter slathered on them to help alleviate any areas that may come across as dry or too thick and bready causing one feel like they are eating a ball of flour. Which leads me to the positing of the fillings. If you are not going to butter them up then the sausage needs to be on the bottom so the grease can soak down. Next would come the egg and then the cheese on top so it melts down plus its oils can soak into the top of the biscuit. The main ingredient in biscuits is white flour thus they can run into being dense and thick instead of light and fluffy, such is the need for melty things to alleviate said issue somewhat. Biting into this came across as the former. Without the melty accoutrements to moderate all the denseness a beverage was necessary to help get this down. Not really so much dry as thick and heavy. The top also kind of came apart after a bite or two which leaves one with more inside than outside and for which utensils become require. Biscuits should not need a fork unless they are smothered in gravy—-maybe that would have helped here.

Okay, so it is not like it is inedible or anything, but, you know, being a Southerner, I have had a lot of the these things over my lifetime and it is a nice try. The Beecher’s cheese had a tangy bite to it and they do make their own sausage, though it was a little sage forward for me. I think a big part of it too is that with tax and tip this little thing is gonna run ya’ $13. It is an okay biscuit combo, but I can’t honestly say it is that. I get the whole big city prices and what not, but when I have had some really good ones for around $6 or $7, paying double just doesn’t seem to cut it. I guess at least I can say I tried it if nothing else and don’t need to make a return visit.

I thought I would assuage my disappointment with a slice of cake, it is a bakery after all, but when I inquired I was told the only slices they were serving that day was the vanilla cake. I’m like what?! You make all these different cakes and the only thing I can get is boring vanilla? Ugh, it did not make the biscuit experience any better. It is a bakery! With cakes! Yet you can only serve one type of slice?! I don’t get it.

Well, if ever there was a bakery bust of a day this was it. I guess if you have never had a biscuit before then this one will perfectly suffice for you. The rest of us have a few more standards that need to be met. I can’t say I won’t ever hit up Macrina again, I might, after all they do at least still have one of the better chocolate chip cookies in town, so there is that.